I LET GO

Lately on Saturdays I pick-up Q at her apartment at Makati and head over to my house at Pasig. It's always around 5:30ish am as my shift at work ends at 5.

I was promoted last December and reaping a few perks of the post: fixed schedule, increased salary, the work process more streamlined.

It's usually a 25-30min drive back and I enjoy the conversations, the updates of what's been happening, the sunrise driving through Edsa through Global City.

In one of those conversations, Q noted that I have tendencies of letting things go and it's true, sometimes the littlest things would tick me off and I'm working on that. I have improved over the years since I no longer think about work as soon as my shift is done and lately I've been working a lot more on my patience whilst driving.

Speaking of letting things go, I finally got around to delete every vestiges of my past with Her.

I feel liberated.

And it also got me thinking of something I have wanted to talk about with Q that I believe she hasn't realized how important it is to me.

Presently, I have lost 18 lbs and I'm half way through my target weight loss. My gym subscription has just expired and I'm leaning on taking up Yoga.

Urban Ashram currently has a promo that I intend on taking up soon. :)

Dream Journal: 01 "Money Frog?"

I dreamt of a big fat short brown snake being handed to me.

As I held the snake, it sprouted legs and slowly its tail stunted and turned into a golden brown, red spotted heavy ass frog.

My arms strained from the weight as I walked.

I went to return the frog to its owner and the frog gripped my left hand and didn't want to let go.

As I handed the frog back I kept hitting the back of its head to let my hand go.

It finally did and I returned to the person who handed me the snake, she winked and said thank you.

She was being graded and had the highest scores which translated to more commission and higher pay.

***
No Idea what this means but I just liked the thought of writing down the dreams that I do come up with.

and there's more to the story of what I dreamt, I can't remember them all though and it's hard to explain, it feels like the story is at the tip of my tongue.

Tomorrow is Today!

For the nth time I promised to write something and anything to return the flow of writing alas, I find myself distracted with Facebook, World of Warcraft, Twitter and what not. -All in that order.

I have also promised for the nth time to stay exercising and lose the miserable 35ish lbs which I have from time and time again found an excuse not to.

Today is different.

Today I'm writing and in a while I will drag my ass back to the gym and pay for the 4 months membership fee.

Run like a madman and crunch sit-ups like a gummy bear.

That is... crossing my fingers I won't go down quicker than a prom date. :D

Priority is losing this effin' belly and getting myself ready for the Boracay trip with Quixotic.

This will be our first trip to Boracay.

So, what have I been doing to motivate myself?

I have the Men's Health Magazine of Derek Ramsay on my desk reminding myself to lose the FAT.

I was at the Mall Of Asia last Sunday and I can't kept help but wish and buy clothes I want to wear but cannot since it won't fit.

I was observing people pass by and admire how flat their stomachs were.

Thinking about it now is rallying me to get up and go to the gym right at this minute...

Maybe in a few after I post this. ;p

Tito Nestor

7:25am and I’m trying to find ways to spend the last 35mins of my time before my shift at work ends.

The most productive I have been at writing are situations where I don’t have access to gaming sites, to my video games and as of late twitter and social networking sites.

Last night I dreamt about my Uncle who passed away 7-8 years ago.

My fondest memories of my childhood were riding his red car on our way to Manuela mall or now called Star Mall. I can’t recall what shows we watched; what games we played or the food we ate but I always enjoyed the “escape” or the ride out of our subdivision.

The joy of hiding in our seats not wanting my mom seeing us running off with Tito Nestor –but then again I realized years later that he would have asked permission that he was treating us somewhere.

I remember his house, the granite walls, and the small pond around their home which was like a moat filled with coy fishes.

Now that I’ve grown up, I wish he could be here to see the person I have become.

I want him here when I get married and would have liked for him to say a speech about me; of the boy he took care of, of the toddler he used to call the Rock, the incredible hulk, the boy who cried out his name when I got bitten by Whitey our Sheep Dog because I kept spanking him with my He-Man sword.

I wonder what my dream was about last night, did we talk? Were we able to catch up? I thought about the letter you wrote on a website I made back in 2001. I was able to find it and now keep it in a separate folder.

If you were still here I think we would have connected more through the available social networking sites; we would probably be exchanging links to things we saw or read that thought cool or funny and what not.

I miss you Tito Nestor, you will always live on in me despite the little time we shared.

I really really wish it could have been more.

29 IT IS.

6:50 am, sipping red wine as I attempt to write an entry for my birthday.

I’m reading each greeting on my Facebook wall from various people / friends that have intersected with my life and it really means a lot that they took their time to send a greet.

It actually, levels up my already special day *smiles*

The game plan for today is spending at least 45 minutes in the gym: 30mins cardio, 15mins weight lifting or sit-ups and then have Red Ribbon (hotline 8-7777) deliver a Mango Roll because I’ve been craving for one since last night, cook pasta –I just need to cook the spaghetti and make the white sauce.

I always felt that this month is my lucky month, any plans or goals I set for myself comes true and I hope some of the plans I have set for myself this year would realize itself apart from my Batanes trip of course.

I also can’t wait to see my paycheck this Saturday.

High Five for Salary Increase! *hehehe*

The alcohol is finally kicking in.

Time to Sleep.

PROMISES FOR 2011

The last year my list was short: get a job, get engaged.

Check and check!

This year I plan on getting these done:

1. LOSE WEIGHT! At 172 cm I weigh at 89kgs and my ideal weight is supposedly 67kgs but I don’t want to be just average built so at least I am going for 72-74kgs… I want to have the same body type as let’s say Matthew McConaughey or Derek Ramsey.

2. Spend my 2nd Year Anniversary with my Fiancée at Batanes. (check! Flight is booked and will be spending it at the end of Feb ^_^)

3. Buy a car, I am thinking about purchase a Honda City 1.3 S MT

4. Upgrade my Desktop and the parts are:

a. mb am3, Asus M4A87TD/USB3

b. AMD Phenom II X4 945 processor

c. Vid Card - Power Color HD6850

d. 4gb (dual) ddr3-1333 G.Skill RipJaws CL8

e. COUGAR RS550 550 watts

5. Enroll in a Basic Photography Class

6. Set up my studio in a vacant room in my house

7. Do a Fashion / Model shoot.

8. Buy a new pair of glasses because I need a higher grade and the frame of my current is falling apart.

9. READ more BOOKS! Last year I think I only read about 4 books in total? Whereas I made it a point to read at least 1 book a month back in the day.

10. Of course save money! It’s about time I refill my savings account.

That’s it for now.

Reading Material

During High-School my teacher told a story that his child when he was a toddler took their newspaper to the toilet while doing number 2.

Their child didn’t know how to read and has not started going to school yet.

When I have kids I want to do it too, so that my kids will do more reading than play video games or what not.

That story stuck with me and I am reminded of it oddly enough, most of the time when I do my “business”

And I’ve always promised myself to bring reading material whenever I do the next time.

It’s been 14 years and I have finally done it!

The reading material just in case you were wondering: Paper Cuts by Pam Pastor.